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Jimmy.....Jimmy Fallon Laura.....Tina Fey Billy.....Will Ferrell Maya.....Maya Rudolph Jimmy's father.....Chris Parnell [ a group of kids are seen in Jimmy's room, bored ] Billy: These board games all suck! Isn't there anything fun?! Laura: You said it, Billy! These games just aren't challenging enough. Maya: Tossing dice and moving pawns is just too dull. [ Jimmy comes in with a board game ] Jimmy: Hey everybody! Check out my new game! Billy, Maya, and Laura: What is it, Jimmy! Jimmy: It's the exciting new board game from Pinker brothers! Laura: Is that what I think it is? Maya: Yes, it's.. [ board game's title is revealed ] ..Rabid Raccoon! Announcer: Yes, it's Rabid Racoon, the exciting and challenging board game! Maya: How do you play! Jimmy: It's easy, Maya! Announcer: Here's how to play! Just put the 40 AA batteries in the Rabid Raccoon.. [ they do as told ] ..fill it with the Radical Rabies Juice.. [ they fill the raccoon with a sack full of goopy liquid ] ..wind up, turn on, and place it on the floor! [ they set down the now Rabid Raccoon ] Each player takes a rabies shot.. [ each player grabs a syringe ] ..and play! Jimmy: Okay, but what do we do now? Announcer: Now, you have to destroy the Rabid Raccoon before he touches you! If he does, then you get rabies!!! [ The kids chase the raccoon, as it moves all over the floor ] Jingle: [ to the tune of "Rocky Raccoon" ] "Rabid Raccoon! Destroy it soon! Before you get sick with rabies! Then you'll need twelve shots, They hurt lots and lots, And you'll cry like twenty babies!" [ Maya gets attacked by the Rabid Raccoon ] Maya: Ow! I've been hit! Laura: Looks like you'll have to go to the hospital! Billy: Guess you're out of the game! [ Maya laughs, as her mouth starts to foam ] Billy: I did it! I killed the raccoon! [ the raccoon goes by ] No!!!!! [ starts to attack Laura ] Jimmy: Well, we didn't destroy the raccoon, but it looks like I won! [ Jimmy's father comes in ] Jimmy's Father: Hi, kids! What are you doing? Kids: [ all of them foaming and bleeding, as they attacked each other ] We're playing Rabid Raccoon! Jimmy's Father: Well, isn't that fun? [ gets attacked by the Rabid Racoon in the face ] Owwww! Billy: Well, guess we're all biohazards! [ they all laugh ] Announcer: Rabid Raccoon! Catch it today! [ SUPER: "40 AA batteries, Radical Rabies Juice, and First Aid kit not included." ] Rate or review this sketch. |
