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[ Cut to a scene out of "Noah's Ark". SHEM, Noah's son, is there at the doorway of the ark with a clipboard, checking off with a pen each pair of unseen animals going by. ] Shem: Wolverine, check. Wombat, check. [ NOAH walks up from inside the ark. ] Noah: Oh Shem. Shem: Oh hey Dad. Noah: How we doing? Shem: Not too bad. Had a bit of an altercation with the tiger but other than that, everything's been all right. Noah: That's good. Shem: How bout you? Noah: Well we decided to move the gazelles away from the lion. Shem: That's a good idea. Noah: We put them by the pantry. Shem: Oh no. You can't do that. They'll nibble on everything. Eat us out of ark and ship. Noah: Oh. I didn't think about that. I'll put the goats there instead. Shem: That's better. Noah: Hey, how many animals do we got left? Shem: Ah...let's see. [ goes through various pages on the clipboard ] We still got the woolly monkeys, yaks and zebras, a zopalot. Noah: A zopalot! What's that? Shem: I don't know. [ looking at the line ] He's not here anyway. Noah: Well all right. You seem to have everything under control. Just make sure that you get seven of the clean animals and two of the other ones. Shem: Okay, dad. Woodchuck, check. Noah: What? Shem: The woodchucks. I just checked them off. Noah: Oh, okay. [ Noah walks back into the ark. ] Shem: Woodpecker. [ to off-screen woodpecker ] Got a date? No singles. [ Shem watches as the woodpecker walks away as Noah runs back. ] Noah: Oh Shem. Shem. Shem: Yeah. What is it? Noah: I forgot to tell you. I talked to God this morning and I asked him if we could postpone the great flood till tomorrow. Shem: What'd he say? Noah: He said okay. He had a tennis tournament today anyway. Shem: Well that's good. Noah: So I was thinking. You want to take a break and go have lunch with Ham and Japheth. Shem: Yeah. All right. Noah: How's Weinerschnitzel sound? Shem: Okay. [ The two walk off. Fade out. ] Rate or review this sketch. |
