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[ Scene: White House, Oval Office 9:00 pm ] [ President George W. Bush, is seen playing with Play-Doh at his desk while wearing Superman Pajamas when Vice President Dick Cheney walks in. ] Dick Cheney: What were you told George? Bedtime is 8:30 and you know it. George W. Bush: Shut up, Dick! [ snickers ] I'm the president of the United States, I can do what I want. Dick Cheney: For the last time, no you can't. And what did I tell you about the Play-Doh? If you're going to play with it use your desk [ points to a card table in the corner ], not mine. George W. Bush: Aw, don't have a heart attack. [ snickers ] Dick Cheney: George, that hasn't been funny in months, you need to go to bed now anyway, you have to get up early to meeting tomorrow with Jacques Chirac. George W. Bush: Where's he from? Dick Cheney: France. George W. Bush: [ consults a globe ] Oh, I knew that. Do I get to ride that kick ass airplane again? Dick Cheney: No, he's coming here. George W. Bush: Can I take a ride on the plane anyways? Dick Cheney: Only if you're good and go to bed now. George W. Bush: Yes! [ Runs off to bed, arms raised in Superman fashion ] [ The Next Morning, 8:30, at the Breakfast table. President Bush, still in Pajamas being served breakfast. ] George W. Bush: Hey, leggo my Eggo. [ snickers ] Chef: Eggos? These are Belgian waffles, made from scratch, not some frozen abomination. George W. Bush: Hee Hee, abominamation, that's a funny word. Chef: [ groans and walks away ] Dick Cheney walks in. Dick Cheney: What are you doing? President Chirac will be here in 20 minutes! George W. Bush: Who? Dick Cheney: I told you last night, he's coming here to meet with you and congratulate you on your presidency. George W. Bush: Oh, I knew that. Dick Cheney: [ exasperated ] Just—just get dressed, OK? [ leaves ] [ Forty minutes later, George Bush is meeting with Jacques Chirac. ] George W. Bush: I feel that you and I could combine our politicating powers as one and do good stuff, want some frog legs? [ hands President Chirac a plate of frog legs ] Chirac: [ disgusted by Bush's child-like and boorish manner ] No, thank you. I really don't eat them. George W. Bush: [ snickering ]You have a funny accent. Chirac: Yes, I know. That's the twelfth time you've said so. George W. Bush: [ obviously distracted ] Hey, I have a bucket of army men, want to play? Chirac: No, that's quite all right. George W. Bush: No it will be fun, I even have some French ones. See? [ Hands Chirac a soldier with it's gun held over it's head ] Chirac: [ obviously shocked and offended ] I can't believe you, how in the world did you ever get elected president of a world power such as this? George W. Bush: I dunno. [ Chirac leaves in anger as Dick Cheney walks in. ] Dick Cheney: What the hell did you do? George W. Bush: [ playing with army men ] That guy had a funny voice. [ snickers ] THE END Rate or review this sketch. |
