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Alex Trebek.....Will Ferrell Sean Connery.....Darrell Hammond Britney Spears.....Reese Witherspoon Angelina Jolie.....Ana Gasteyer (Jeopardy theme music plays) Alex Trebek: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. I can't believe I am still doing this but due to my recent divorce from my wife and the fact that she took everything I have to suffer through this hell whole once again! With that being said, Let's take a look at the scores. Britney Spears is in first place with $20. Britney Spears: First off, I would like to set the record straight that my boobs are very real and would like to say hi to my boyfriend Justin Timberlake and encourage everyone to buy N'Syncs newest cd, Celebrity. Hey Justin. (makes kissing motions). Alex Trebek: Whatever. Moving on, we have Angelina Jolie in second place with $10. Angelina Jolie: Hey Alex. I would like to say hi to my husband Billy Bob and would like to inform the viewers that I have the pendant around my neck where I keep some drops of his blood.(holds up pendant) Alex Trebek: You are very sick. Moving on, in third place we have Sean Connery with a -$4,000. Sean Connery: Hey Trebek, tell your mother I had a good time last night. (Connery laughs) Alex Trebek: Okay I'm going to let that last comment slide. Let's take a look at the categories for Double Jeopardy. And the categories are: Potent Potables, Famous Bonds, which are actors from Bond movies, Bloussant Products, M&Ms, Don't Sit Here, Cars, and finally "Falls That Begin With Niagra." Britney you are in first place so we will start with you. Britney Spears: I will take Enemas for $500. Alex Trebek: That is M&M's not enemas. Lets move on. Ms. Jolie, Why don't you pick. Angelina Jolie: I'll take Gone in 60 seconds for $7000. Alex Trebek: What's wrong with you people. Let me pick the cateory. The Category is Cars and the answer is, "You usually see these at a drive in theater. (Britney Spears buzzes in). Ms Spears. Britney Spears: What is a plastic surgeon. (buzzer sounds). Alex Trebek: No. (Angelina buzzes in) Mrs. Jolie. Angelina Jolie: What is Tombraider Alex Trebek: No, good lord! Someone else please. (Connery buzzes in) Yes, Mr. Connery. Sean Connery: That would be me humping your mother on the floor Trebek. Alex Trebek: Stop that please. The answer is cars. Mr. Connery the board is yours. Sean Connery: I'll take famous Buns for $900. Alex Trebek: That's Famous Bonds not "Buns". And the answer is, "This actor starred in the 1986 Bond Film, "The Living Daylights." (Connery buzzes in) Mr. Connery. Sean Connery: Jennifer Lopez. Alex Trebek: its not famous buns, Mr. Connery. Unfortunately the board is still yours. Sean Connery: I'll take Falls That Begin With Viagra for $3000. Alex Trebek: The answer is not Viagra, its...You know what forget it and lets just go to Final Jeopardy. The category is, "Where are you from?" Just tell me where you are from.(music plays). it can be from your mothers stomach or jail but just write something down. i do not care if you lie to me. (music stops). Okay, let's start with you Brittney. You wrote down Mickey Mouse Club and you wagered your boyfriend Justin. Britney Spears: What do you think? Alex Trebek: I think you have too much air up your head. Moving on, Angelina Jolie wrote down, Nothing and you wagered "Tombraider". good for you. (Angelina smirks) Finally we have Mr. Connery. Sean Connery: hello again, Trebek. Alex Trebek: You wrote down, "A house". Okay that is good. and your wager, "A house where I can bonk Trebek's mom. (Connery laughs). Alex Trebek: Wonderful. I am Alex Trebek saying good night and never watch this show again. Rate or review this sketch. |
