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October 6th, 2001
Host: Seann William Scott

  • Why I Can't Go Out With You
    Reasons for cancelled date are explored deeply.
    - written by Bob Barron

  • Starter Athletic Jerseys
    Starter Jerseys can make people think you're the real athlete.
    - written by Mario Lanza

  • Jordan Davidson at the Elton John Concert
    Elton's biggest fan Jordan Davidson gets snubbed at his concert.
    - written by Kevin Paul

  • Royal Order Meeting of the Elks
    Men's Elks Club is forced to add a female member to the group.
    - written by Patrick Lonergan

  • The A-Hole
    The Rev. Jesse Jackson and Bill Clinton try to find the culprit.
    - written by Christina Bultinck

  • A Message From John Ashcroft
    John Ashcroft lists the members of the special forces team he's assembled.
    - written by Will Roy

  • Special Ed
    Unruly students make study period difficult on their teacher.
    - written by Jessica Whitt

  • America Attacked..Kind Of
    Militia sketch is just a disguise to get Mark Polishuk's name on SNL.
    - written by Charlie G.

  • Enemy At The Gates
    While St. Peter takes a break, bully Rocco condemns all the good people to Hell.
    - written by Mark Polishuk

  • The Annoying Neighbor
    Family regrets moving in after dealing with the antics of their neighbor.
    - written by Martina Fetzer

  • Roman Times
    Pair of Roman guards ponder where rain comes from.
    - written by Vincent Gargiulo

  • The Show's Going Good!
    Rapid cast firings accentuate Lorne Michaels' opinion of the show so far.
    - written by Will Roy

  • Taliban TV
    Samples of Taliban TV's new "must-see" Tuesday line-up.
    - written by Mario Lanza

  • Patriot Mobile
    Patriotic American accuses Traffic Cop of denouncing his freedoms.
    - written by Patrick Lonergan

  • The Ass Prodder
    Harold's unusual occupation makes for awkward party conversation.
    - written by J.P. Ragan

  • Celebrity Jeopardy
    Sean Connery vies against Christina Aguilera and Tom Green for Alex Trebek's nerves.
    - written by Daniel Lewis Pollak

  • Blue's Clues
    Search for Steve's insulin leads to true nature of his personality.
    - written by John

  • Who Wants to be Beaten by a Gorilla? Celebrity Edition
    Game show gorillas give payback to Carrot Top, Pauly Shore and John Leguizamo.
    - written by Will Roy

  • Miss America Pageant
    Final five contestants can't handle simple multiple-choice questions.
    - written by Martina Fetzer

  • Bush-Guiliani Discussion
    Mayor Guiliani propses Whack-a-Taliban as solution to World Trade Center attack.
    - written by J.P. Arcand
Seann William Scott - 10/6/01

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