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Lover 1.....Will Ferrell Lover 2.....Rachel Dratch Student 1.....Jimmy Fallon Student 2.....Horatio Sanz Student 3.....Ana Gasteyer Student 4.....Gwyneth Paltrow (setting is in a classroom. The lovers have come in to teach the class about sex education) Lover 1: Hello class me and my lover have come to talk to you about something that we know quite a lot about, isn't that right..lover? Lover 2: That's right lover. You see me and my lover here make love quite a bit. Each morning we rise with the sun fill our belly's with ham and make love to the rising sun. Student 1: Ah....ya this is kinda sick. We don't want to know about your love life ok. Can you just teach the class? Lover 1: Well i've been making love to my lover here for over 4 years straight so i think i know what i'm talking about. Student 1: ...but i'm just saying...... Lover 1: You shut your mouth..that what i'm saying..ok!! I'll slap it. You shut your mouth or i will slap it!! Student 1: (trying not to laugh) ok!! ok dude chill! Lover 1: If you don't mind i'm going to get back to talking about my lover and the constant love that we make each day and night. Lover 2: Wow lover your anger and strength makes me want to make love to you right now. Lover 1: Is that right lover? Class if you don't mind i must make love to my lover right here. Feel free to watch you might learn something. You see when my lover wants something i give it to her... Student 2: Oh come on man this a classroom!! Lover 1: HEY! what did i say about shutting the mouth! Student 2: Wel....you said you would slap it. Lover 1: That's right.. so shut it... i'm going to make love now. Love is a beautiful thing between two lovers and it's something that i enjoy very much. (lover 1 disrobes) Class:(various voices) oh god!!.... Oh please but it back on.....damn he looks like chewbacca ....ahhh.. noooo Lover 2: Class please the human body is a beautiful instrument of love. Especially my lovers body. Once a month we awake early fill our belly's with berries, i shave my lovers chest and we make love all day. Student 3: AH...i don't care what you fill your belly's with please tell your ...lover to put his clothes on!! Student 4: Yes please, your lovers smell is making me sick...oh my god! Lover 1: Oh yes.... that revolting stentge turns my lover on quite a bit. Lover 2: Yes.. we make love constantly not stopping for showers or eating. Student 1: Oh god this is too much i'm leaving!! Lover 1: Hey you sit down or i will slap you Student 1: No i'm not going to sit down..ok.. this is sick. you were supposed to come in and talk about sex education instead your...your..i don't know what the hell your doing.....i'm leaving....... (the rest of the class gets up and leaves disgusted too) Lover 2: Well lover...it appears that we are alone.. Lover 1: Yes lover. I have a naughty idea can you guess what it is?? Lover 2: No... what is it lover?? Lover 1: We should fill our belly's with the fats of the land...lay down and make love till the noon hour.. Lover 2: I like it lover (lover 2 gets up and staddles lover 1) Lover 1: ah yess lover......ahhh...ahhh... damn, my back...my back......... Lover 2: Whats wrong lover?? (start applause) Lover 1: Whats wrong....my damn back.....get off.............ahhh damn it....get the hell off... fade skit out Rate or review this sketch. |
