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Alex Trebek.....Will Ferrell .....Hugh Jackman Hugh Grant.....Seth Meyers Sean Connery.....Darrell Hammond (Jeopardy theme plays) Alex Trebek: Welcome back to Celebrity Jeopardy. I would like to ask Mr. Connery to refrain from mooning me again. I was almost blinded by the sight of his crinkly old ass. That being said let us take a look at the scores. Hugh Jackman is in third place with -$300 dollars. So far he has answered everyone question with the word "Australia". Hugh Jackman: I am Australian you know. Alex Trebek: I know, Mr. Jackman. You have already said that before. I read your bio, ok. Next, we have Hugh Grant in second place with -$150. Hugh Grant: Do, I get any hookers as my constellation prize? Alex Trebek: You are playing for charity Mr. Grant, you are not paying off any hoes. Finally we have Mr. Connery in first place with $1. Sean Connery: Hey Trebek, I brought a bag you can use to put on your wife's head when you guys have sex. Alex Trebek: Please stop! And now on to the categories. They are "Victorian Houses", "The Taliban", "Harry Potter", "The Public Library", "words that end in histmas", "Not Another Sean Connery Movie" and "Things You Suck." Mr. Jackman you are in the lead so we will start with you. Hugh Jackman: I'll take "Swordfish" for $500. Alex Trebek: That is not one of the categories Mr. Jackman. Please pick again. Hugh Jackman: I'll take "Horny Potter" for $7,000. Alex Trebek: It is "Harry Potter", not "Horny Potter". and the answer is, "This movie feauturing wizadry is a huge sensation with kids."(Hugh Grant buzzes in). Yes, Mr. Grant. Hugh Grant: "Goonies" (Buzzer dings). Alex Trebek: No. Anyone else? (Buzzer sounds) The answer was "Harry Potter." Mr. Grant, why don't you pick one. Hugh Grant: I will take Elizabeth Hurley. Alex Trebek: You know what forget it. Let's move on to Mr. Connery. Mr. Connery, pick a category. Sean Connery: I'll take "Victorian Hoes" for $5000 (He laughs hysterically). Alex Trebek: Ok, that is it. Let's just go to final Jeopardy. And the category is, "Do you Believe in Santa". If you do I do not care just say something(Theme music plays). Answer with whatever you want(music stops). Now let's take a look at what you guys wrote. Mr. Jackman wrote down "XXX". Ok. and you wagered "men." you are an idiot. Hugh Jackman: X-men rules. Alex Trebek: Whatever. Mr. Grant wrote nothing and he wagered, "Elizabeth Hurley". Good job. (Grant smiles) Finally we have Sean Connery and he wrote, "Hairy" and you wagered "Pussy". (Connery Laughs) Okay, I quit. That's it for Celebrity Jeopardy,as as always no money for charity. Good Night. (ending music) Rate or review this sketch. |
