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JARED FOGLE.....Jimmy Fallon JOHN WATSON.....Tracy Morgan LAURA THOMPSON.....Amy Poehler CLAY HENRY.....Seth Myers Slow motion shot of JARED FOGLE, the Subway spokesman, walking in the park. Voice over: Jared has lost a lot of weight eating Subway sandwiches, but what does he drink to keep those pounds off? Jared: Easy, I just drink Subway Ale Ultra! Slow motion shot of JARED chugging the can of beer, with beer flowing all over his face. Voice over song: He's still lookin' good Eating subway sandwiches But when he wants to get drunk He drinks Subway Ale Ultra Jared V/O: All over America people are keeping the weight off with Subway Ale Ultra! Shot of JOHN WATSON riding down the street giving the thumbs up. Caption reads: "John Watson lost 90 pounds". He looking a bit tipsy, then crashes his bike into a parked car. Shot of LAURA THOMPSON roller blading in the park, giving the thumbs up. Caption reads: "Laura Thompson lost 75 pounds". She stumbles over to a bush and throws up. Shot of CLAY HENRY sliding down a pole in a firehouse. Caption reads: "Clay Henry lost 125 pounds." He takes a couple of steps, stumbles to the ground as the fire truck takes off. Cut to JARED in the park Jared: So if you wanna get plowed, but still keep the weight off so you don't get stuck with the fat girl in the bar at closing time, drink Subway Ale Ultra. Just look at us! Wide shot of JARED, JOHN, LAURA, and CLAY all chugging cans of Subway Ale Ultra. LAURA belches, JOHN gropes her, attempting to kiss her, JARED goes over to a bush to vomit. Flash Subway Ultra Ale logo. Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
