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Polly Purebreed.....Maya Rudolph Underdogg/Snoop Dogg.....Snoop Dogg Simon.....Darrell Hammond Cad.....Will Forte Guy.....Keenan Thompson Other Chick.....Amy Poehler Jack Slick.....Chris Parnell Announcer.....Finesse Mitchell [Scene: Green Screen. Super 'This preview has been rated PGG'] Announcer: (v/o) What's the biggest Superhero flick out this summer? Spiderman 2? No. Catwoman? Hell no. It's Underdog. [Show a big picture of Underdog with the caption 'Underdog' underneath it. Snoop Dogg's head appears in the Underdog picture and he starts talking.] Snoop Dogg: I hate to interrupt, but excuse me. Isn't that supposed to be spelt D-O double g? [The 'Underdog' caption changes to read 'Underdogg'. Snoop Dogg smiles and nods. Snoop Dogg tune plays softly in background.] Announcer: (v/o) It's the story of a simple shoe shine boy... [Underdogg as shoe shine boy(nerdy with glasses etc.) is shining Guy's shoes.] Guy: Nice job, boy. Here's a dollar. Underdogg: (as shoe shine boy. Stands up and is angry. Right in Guy's face) Boy? Who you calling boy, you punk ass bitch! Guy: I...I'm sorry...I... [Underdogg sees Polly Purebreed and waves at her.] Underdogg: (as shoe shine boy. To Polly Purebreed.) Shoe shine? Polly Purebreed: I would but I'm wearing open toed heels... Underdogg: (as shoe shine boy. To Polly Purebreed.) Well, how about I shine what shoe you got for a dollar and then shine your pretty little toes for free. Polly Purebreed: Oh my, well... Other Chick: C'mon Polly, we got to go or we'll be late. Nice try Mr. Shoe Shine. [Exit Polly Purebreed then Other Chick who gives Underdogg a smirk.] Underdogg: Beotch. [Guy tries to exit screen.] Underdogg: (as shoe shine boy) Did I say you could go? Announcer: (v/o) A shoe shine boy who is trying to save the world... [Cut to Simon in Cad in darkened area] Simon: Ha ha Cad. It's my most brilliant plan ever. We'll stand under this sewer grate and take pictures of women's underpants as they walk over! Cad: Uh boss. How is that gonna help us take over the world? Simon: Just shuttup and keep taking pictures, that's how! [Cut to shot of Underdogg with a criminal in a headlock. The criminal is wearing a mask and holding a bag with a $ on it so we know he's a criminal. He spots the sewer grate and notices a light flashing below as a lady walks over it.] Underdogg: "Mercy, mercy me. Things ain't what they" seem to be. "Oh no." [Cut to shot of Polly Purebreed and Other Chick walking along. Underdogg steps in front of them.] UnderDogg: I'm gonna have to ask you to stop right there pretty lady. Something's going on down there that's really kinda shady. [Underdogg removes the sewer grate and pulls Simon and Cad out of the sewer.] Simon: Dammit. Foiled again by that blasted hound! Cad: This is so embarrassing. I don't even like women's underpants. Underdogg: Well, it's off to jail with freak one and freak two. Enjoy the rest of your day... (to Polly Purebreed) See you later boo. Other Chick: Who was that? Polly Purebreed: That was...*sigh*...Underdogg. Announcer: (v/o) And like any good story, it's about love... [Cut to scene with Underdogg (as shoe shine boy) standing in the foreground as Polly Purebreed has lunch with Jack Slick.] Jack Slick: C'mon Polly why not let me come over tonight. Polly Purebreed: I'm sorry I can't...I'm busy. Jack Slick: With what, your cats? How many cats do you have again? Polly Purebreed: Five... Jack Slick: Ha ha ha that's so pathetic. You don't need five cats...what you need is one man. Me. Why stay home alone petting your kitty when I can come over and we can pet your uh kitty together... [During Polly's next line Underdogg(as shoe shine boy) exits shot] Polly Purebreed: Uh...well...it does get kinda lonely...but...maybe...I don't know... [Underdogg enters.] Underdogg: Hey punk, it's obvious you're trying to jack her. Save your breath, cuz this is one Polly that won't let you crack her. Polly Purebreed: Underdogg. One second, I need to just take care of something. Jack Slick: (to Underdogg) Listen you overratted mutt... [Polly Purebreed pulls out some mace and begins spraying Jack Slick in the eyes. He screams and exits.] Underdogg: Damn, sorry to interrupt but I thought I heard you yelp. But when all was said and done, I guess you really didn't need my help. Polly Purebreed: No, but I'm glad you're here. Sit down. Underdogg: Well, I should really go and that's no bull...but I'll sit awhile cause damn girl, "you're so beautiful". [The two are about to kiss. A bubble appears above Polly's head. In it Underdogg as shoe shine boy appears and waves looking like a total nerdling.] Polly Purebreed: (sad) I...I can't. Underdogg: It's okay, no need to cry. I think I know the reason why. [A bubble appears above Underdogg's head. In it Polly is making out with Other Chick.] Underdogg: Damn, I need to change the station on my bad imagination. Woman's voice: (v/o) Help, Underdogg! Underdogg: (to Polly Purebreed) Later bitch. [Exit Underdogg. Polly Purebreed sighs.] [Cut to Underdogg flying through the air.] Underdogg: (into camera) "Speed of lightning, roar of thunder". "Fighting all who rob or plunder." It's me, it's me, the Under-D-O double g. (makes weird symbol with his fingers). Lizzle my nizzle. Announcer: (v/o) Underdogg the movie. Coming soon, yo. [Fade Out to Snoop Dogg's 'Beautiful' song.] [Lyrics in quotes are from Marvin Gaye's 'Mercy, Mercy me', Snoop Dogg's 'Beautiful', and the Underdog television show theme song respectively.] Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
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