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.....Scarlett Johannson Bill Murray.....Will Forte (The scene opens on Scarlett on the main stage.) Scarlett: Thank you, thank you everyone it really is great to finally be hosting Saturday Night Live. I have to admit I was pretty surprised when they asked me if I wanted to host the show. I mean who am I to be hosting one of the greatest comedy shows ever. Well I did always hear some wacky stories from Bill Murray when I did Lost in Translation with him- (Bill Murray runs out onto the set in a Garfield costume.) Bill: Hey there, Scarlett. Scarlett: Hi Bill uh what are you doing in the Garfield costume? Bill: Oh you know just doing a little cross promotion for the Garfield movie. Scarlett: But Bill didn’t that movie come out like 2 months ago. Bill: Oh okay so what are you promoting, Mrs. Thing? Scarlett: Uh nothing. Bill: Well I am trying to get the word out, okay? Go see Garfield people. Contrary to belief, it is still in theatres - it just usually only shows once a day in that little smelly theatre, you know the one I'm talking about. Scarlett: (worried) Well thanks for dropping by, Bill- Bill: Please don’t make me go! Garfield was DOA and now I am living back with my parents. I don’t want to do Caddyshack 3. Scarlett: (patronizing) Tell you what, Bill, we’ll make a sequel to Lost in Translation, it’ll be “More Lost in Translation” okay Bill. Bill: That sounds like a good idea, I’ll finally get an Oscar, then I can sell it on Ebay and retire. You’re a gem, Scarlett babe. Scarlett: No problem Bill, now why don’t you just go wait offstage for me, okay? Bill: Okay (Bill walks offstage depressed.) Scarlett: Well anyway we have- (A gunshot is heard offstage.) Scarlett: Eh, he had his run. Well anyway we have a great show tonight, no crappy flavor of the month musical guest so stick around we’ll be right back. Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
