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.....Cameron Diaz Mark.....Chris Parnell (Camera fades in of a close up of Cameron’s dressing room) (Mark knocks on the door) Mark: Cameron? Can I come in? (Cameron comes to the door; opens the door) Cameron: Hello? Mark: Cameron, I’m Mark, one of the writers. Lorne said you wanted to see me. Cameron: Yeah. Come in. Can I get you anything? Mark: I’m fine. Did you want to talk about the sketch? Cameron: Yeah. (Gets really pissed off) What the hell! Mark: What? Cameron: What the hell! Mark: What? Cameron: This is my third time hosting and the best you can come up with is a parody of “There’s Something About Mary”? Mark: What? I actually thought the idea was rather clever. Cameron: Look, dude! This is Saturday Night Live! Not Mad TV! Not even some comedy website where a bunch of dorks write stupid, candy ass sketches to make their buddies laugh! This is the genuine thing here! Saturday Night Live! Mark: Cameron, I’m sorry if you disagree with the piece, but I worked really, really hard on it. Cameron: Really hard? You’ve got Horatio playing my retarded brother, Warren, saying “Franks & Beans” for half the sketch! That’s plain just lazy! Mark: You may have a point there. Cameron: Yeah dude! I do! Mark: But Cameron, can I just say something? I really love your work…and me writing this sketch is my way of honoring your work. Cameron: Dude, you’ve got me shaking my ass endlessly through out the entire sketch. I mean, what the hell! Mark: Yeah, sorry about that. It’s just a dream of mine…having you shake your ass for 5 minutes…in my face. Cameron: That’s just a bit creepy, dude! Mark: Okay…but can saying something…you are really sexy when you’re angry! Cameron: Really? Am I turning you on? Mark: Yeah…am I turning you on? Cameron: You better believe it! Mark: Are you and Justin still going out? Cameron: No. Do you want to do it? Mark: Well…yeah (Camera fades back as Cameron throws Mark onto the couch) (Cameron takes off her top and grabs a remote to turn on the CD player) (Cue Music – “Rock Your Body” by Justin Timberlake) (Mark & Cameron start to make out hardcore on the couch) (Fade out) Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
