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Conan O'Brien...Darrell Hammond Carson Daly...Johnny Knoxville Max Weinberg...Seth Meyers La Bamba...Horatio Sanz [Open on "Late Night With Conan O'Brien" commercial bumper or stock footage of the Max Weinberg 7 playing out of a commercial. Dissolve to Conan at his desk.] Conan O'Brien: Welcome back, everybody. We've got a great show for you tonight. Terrific show, fantastic show, wonderful show. Fran Drescher will be out in a bit. But before we go any further, another member of the NBC family has asked me if he can plug his new book on my show. I said I'd let him do it as long as he agreed to participate in a game afterwards. So everyone, won't you please welcome the host of "Last Call with Carson Daly," Carson Daly! [Applause as Carson Daly steps out from behind the curtain, walks to Conan's desk and sits in one of the chairs] Conan O'Brien: Great to see you again, Carson. How have things been going over at "Last Call"? Carson Daly: Not bad for 1:30 in the morning. I hear we're beating most of the infomercials and test patterns we're up against. Conan O'Brien: That's great! Now, you've got a new book coming out. Why don't you tell us about it. Carson Daly: Well, Conan, it's all about my years as the host of programs like "Last Call" and "TRL." [Holds up his book] It's called "How To Put The 'Suck' In 'Succeed'." It'll be in bookstores May 20th. Conan O'Brien: Very nice! And now, ladies and gentlemen, it's time to play a new game on the show titled "Let's Kick Carson Daly In The Nuts"! [Band fanfare. Super: "Let's Kick Carson Daly In The Nuts"] Carson Daly: [looking confused] Wait, the what what in the what? Conan O'Brien: That's right. [Puts fishbowl filled with bits of paper on the desk] We've selected 40 finalists who wanted a shot at giving Carson Daly a nice kick in the crotch, and one lucky winner will get that chance tonight! Carson Daly: Dude, this isn't what we did in rehearsal. Conan O'Brien: [Ignoring Carson] Now, for those of you whose names are not chosen, here's what you get: For the ladies, you get to spend the night with Max Weinberg. [Cut to Max Weinberg behind the drums, grinning and rubbing his hands like a pervert. Cut back to Conan] Conan O'Brien: And for the fellas, you get to spend the night with La Bamba. [Cut to trombone player La Bamba staring into the camera. Cut back to Conan] Conan O'Brien: Okay, here we go. [Drumroll as Conan reaches into the fishbowl to grab a name] And the lucky winner is... [He tries to pull a name out, but all the entries are stuck to each other. Drumroll stops] Uh-oh, they're all stuck together. I guess that means ... EVERYBODY WINS! Come on out! [SFX: Bell ringing. Flashing super: "EVERYBODY WINS!" Carson reluctantly stands. Band plays "Happy Days Are Here Again" as a crowd of people line up in front of Carson. One by one, they give Carson a kick in the crotch and Carson yells in pain. Cut to Conan] Conan O'Brien: We'll take a break. When we come back, Fran Drescher will join us. [Cut back to the nut-kicking procession as audience applauds. The "Late Night" logo appears in the corner of the screen. Fade] Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
