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.....Don Pardo .....Christopher Walken (Fade in) Don Pardo: Saturday Night Live would now like to present another “Real Celebrity Moment”. Tonight’s moment: Christopher Walken pretends he’s the President of The United States. (Camera pans on Christopher Walken in his basement, setting up a Oval Office set and preparing the cam-corder) Christopher Walken: Hello…my fellow Americans. It’s me…the President of the United States, Christopher Walken. (Pause) I just wanted to address an issue that I know has been bugging a lot of people. “The Scary Bastard Troll Cult” has been terrorizing many…many people these last few months…and I just want to say, “The Scary Bastard Troll Cult” is now, no…more. They are now…dead. I enlisted the help of several avenues. I enlisted the help of The White Stripes and their “Seven Nation Army”…and…I also enlisted the help of Harry Potter and his magical friends. Now folks, I know what you are probably saying, “The Seven Nation Army” only exists through song…and Harry Potter and his magical friends aren’t real people…well guess what…that…doesn’t matter…because “The Scary Bastard Troll Cult” is gone. So stick that in your pipe…and smoke it. This is Christopher Walken, your president, saying…I wish you were dead…and I was dead, too. Good night and I’ll see you…in “The Dead Zone”. (Camera pans back) Don Pardo: This has been another “Real Celebrity Moment”. (Fade out) Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
