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…Andy Samberg Rocky…Jack Black The Duke…Neil Young Cabin Bear…Fred Armisen (Fade in) (Andy Samberg stands at the end of the home base stage to introduce the special musical guest) Andy Samberg: Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to introduce an amazing father/son rock duo from Toronto, Canada. The rock duo of “Rocky & The Duke”! (Pan to the music stage) The Duke: Thank you. Join us tonight on drums is a real hellcat, Cabin Bear. Rocky: Tonight, we’re gonna play some songs that we’ve written and performed over the years. And it brings us much joy to be with you, here, tonight during this holiday season. The Duke: Here’s a song we like to call “Mountain Man” (Rocky & The Duke start playing their guitars, playing a folk-rock song) "Way up in the mountains, not far from the everglades, Lived a rocky mountain man, who wore dark shades. He liked to kill and eat stray hikers and the occasional mountain lion, He was a world-renowned gorment cook of inserts and dead hikers… But the thing he liked the most in life was killing those stray hikers." (Rocky & The Duke and Cabin Bear begin jamming into the rock song) (Audience applauses; the duo stops playing) Rocky: Thanks folks! That was a song we wrote in 1997, after our old drummer went missing, we came to believe a mountain man, like the guy in the song, killed him. The Duke: That was a great night. The Maple Leafs were killing the Los Angeles Kings, and you had just come back from the beer store with a case of Molson. You wanna play another song? Rocky: Sure, pop! This next one is called “Beer” (Rocky & The Duke start playing their guitars, playing another folk-rock song) "Don’t go walking down paths never taken before, Don’t veer of course; don’t ever forget your beer. Don’t cry wolf if you ain’t got to, don’t be a menace, Dennis, Don’t be burden on your wife, don’t you ever go out and not come back with beer. Don’t get bit by the snake that don’t carry the wisdom, Don’t fall off no cliff. Be like Norm, just sit on your stool and drink your beer." (Rocky & The Duke and Cabin Bear begin jamming into the rock song) (Audience applauses; the duo stops playing) The Duke: Thank you. That was the song “Beer”. I’m pretty sure we were drunk when we wrote that. Rocky: Pop, I think you’re right. This next song is one I wrote myself. I was high when I wrote it. I’m high right now, but that’s beside the point. This song is called “Time of Black Old Days” (Rocky starts playing his guitar, playing a harder rock song) "Long before the end of time, there was a dark deadly age. Kings and queens and time and monsters filled with rage! (Gets out of his seat is strumming the rock ballad; Cabin Bear playing drums) Rage! Monsters who killed people…filled with rage! These monsters did kill people…did killed people! Rage! Sweaty warriors and sweaty whores (beep)-ing at the time… Killed by monsters as they destroyed little…Rage!" (The Duke begins strumming with his son Rocky; song ends as the lights go dark) Rocky: Thank you. Those lights’ going down only means its time for our last song. The Duke: With the holiday season here, I think it’s only right for us to give everyone some advice through song. Let’s play “Save It For Another Day”. (Rocky & The Duke start playing their guitars, playing a folk-rock song) "Roam the world in a day, save it, save it for another day. Make your way to the play, save it, save it for another day. Kiss the sky on a sunny day; kiss the sky when it rains. Save it, save it, save it for another day. A mother and a daughter having sex with each other, it’s not weird It’s beautiful. Beautiful. There’s nothing wrong with incest. It’s beautiful. Beautiful. And so what if her brother, the daughter’s uncle gets into it, it’s not weird. It’s beautiful. Beautiful. There’s nothing wrong with sex with your relatives. Keep it the family. Save it. Save it. Save it for another day!" Rocky: Thank you. (Pan to Andy Samberg standing at home base) Andy Samberg: You can pick up the collection of “Rocky & The Duke” at Saturday Night You-dot-com. And look for them to be on the Canadian version of “COPS” known as “Mounties” next month or sooner than that. (Fade out) (Bumper of the new “Rocky & The Duke” CD called “The Cannibalistic Mountain Man & Incest: North American Family Values”) Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
