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Announcer(voice)...Chris Parnell Male Owner...Fred Armisen Female Owner...Maya Rudolph Patron 1...Will Forte Patron 2...Amy Poehler Patron 3...Bill Hader Patron 4...Horatio Sanz Patron 5...Jason Sudeikis Patron 6...Andy Samberg Patron 7...Seth Meyers Patron 8...Kristen Wiig Patron 9...Kenan Thompson Patron 10...Jorma Taccone (filmed clip of several extras sitting around eating at a pubby restaurant) Announcer (voice): For a new atmosphere in good food eating, come on down to... (two Chinese owners come out and scream) Owners: CHOPSTICKS!!!!!!!! Male Owner: It’s our new restaurant place in downtown area. Please, be very good and try it out now. Female Owner: We innovative new eating place to eat. Very fun. Chopsticks for all types of food. Big variety of food! (cut to patron 1 trying to eat pasta with meatballs) Male Owner (voice): Spaghetti with meatballs! (cut to patron 2 attempting to eat a tomato in a salad) Female Owner (voice): Salad! (cut to patron 3 trying to eat a steak) Male Owner (voice): Steak! (cut to patron 4 at a sneeze-screen with many foods under a buffet, looking frustrated) Female Owner (voice): Buffet! (cut to patron 5 trying to hold the pen with chopsticks as he endorses bill) Male Owner (voice): Paying for food! (cut to patron 6 trying to rip toilet paper in stall with chopsticks) Female Owner (voice): Going to bathroom! Announcer (voice): Chopsticks in the downtown area of Harvard. And make sure to visit one of their many affiliated restaurants within in the area including... (cut to patron 7 unable to eat rice with skewer) ...Skewers... (cut to patron 8 attempting to break lobster with giant stirring spoon) ...Wooden Spoons... (cut to patron 9 having a tough time grasping a burrito with tongs) ...and Salad Tongs. Why not give them a try? Please?! (cut to two owners smiling and getting really close to camera, as patron 10 has trouble cutting a slice of pizza with his chopsticks) Owners: CHOPSTICKS FUN!!!!!!!!! Announcer (voice): Anybody with any foreign utensils will be asked to leave. (fade) Rate or review this sketch | Prior comments |
